Monday 6 February 2012

The Faceless Bastard is Dead.

This is Harold. I hacked into Faceless' blog to tell you guys that I fucking killed his ass and- Ha ha just kidding guys it's me Faceless. Sorry it's been so long. I'm sure all of you out there were so worried about me. So I'll just tell you where I've been before I tell you what happened.

Well after settling things with Harold I went back to the camper to see if they found out how he had gained these powers. Turns out the fear he somehow gained the power of used to have some kind of cult in this area and Harold found it's old meeting area. There was some kind of residual energy trapped there ever since and he managed to somehow absorb it. So I went there and made sure the place was completely destroyed so no one could do it again.

Now onto why you're here. You want to know what happened with Harold. Well Harold was waiting for me at a park. When I arrived he started in on a monologue about how he was going to avenge his family and blah blah blah. I threw a knife at him too shut him up. He turned into gas and attacked me. I noticed he kept turning back solid when he actually wanted to touch me and realized the gas form was incapable of causing harm. That was a disadvantage I could probably use. I kept swinging the machete at him to force him to stay in gas form. Now for the plan I had concocted I just needed to release the birds.

I reached up to my mask and immediately I noticed a new flaw in my plan. It was rather obvious in hindsight. See, there had been a reason my other mask was so loose. It allowed me to easily release the birds. This new mask was tight and refused to slide off. I would need to unstrap it first and I couldn't do that while warding off Harold's attacks. It was rather intelligent strategy on his part. As I fumbled with the straps I began to run from him but he stayed on me. I am ashamed to admit that I took over seven minutes to realize the obvious. I didn't need to remove the mask to release the birds. I dodged out of the way of Harold's reaching hand brought the machete to my throat and slid it across. I'm not going to lie. It hurt like a motherfucker but, it worked. The birds flew out and swarmed Harold. As expected Harold turned into his gas form to evade them and they did exactly as we had planned. They took a big breath. Harold was absorbed into their systems. Then they flew up into the air and brought down the lightning. They blasted themselves with lightning until every trace of Harold was gone.

That my friends is how you kill a smoke monster. Take that you Lost idiots.

So anyways I won and I'm back. You may scream now.

3 comments:

  1. ....I'm not sure if this is trolling me or not. I'm also not sure if I care. Welcome back, you magnificent Bastard.

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    Replies
    1. Glad to be back babe.

      Tomorrow I leave for a normal assignment. It will feel good to be back to killing normal flesh and blood people.

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    2. I should also feel worse about this than I do. Damn it. I'm getting too desensitized.

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